I've wanted to start a blog for longer than I care to admit. I have danced around the idea, toyed with it like a cat with a ball of yarn, always finding more ways to avoid it (it's so much pressure, what if I can't think of anything to write, everyone will see how much I overuse commas, etc.). But my resistance was worn down over time, mostly by the growing desire to stop letting fear dictate my choices. So, here I am. And it feels right.
This process has been and will be shot through with grace. The idea of being given something that that I do not deserve and could not earn has always been an elusive concept for me. I prefer things I can control through my effort and competence. But grace is a cornerstone of the Christian life and I am confronted with my need for it on a regular basis. I need grace to comprehend my need for grace and I need more grace to accept the grace I've been given. One great irony is that the translation of my first name actually means grace. Good one, God. You got me.
The pearl has several meanings. It started as a fake middle name (long story) that became a nickname and has now become a reminder for me of the growth process that we experience this side of heaven. It takes a long time of being covered by layer after layer of God’s love and grace to bring forth the beauty inside of us. Part of the process is choosing to believe that beauty really is in there beneath all the mess, and that it’s worth discovering. The next step is choosing to believe that it’s worth offering to the world. I hope that I am able to share pictures of the work that God is doing in me and hopefully through me. I hope that my words point more to Him than to me. I hope to offer pearls of grace.
